While I am an not an influencer, your words resonate so deeply with my complex feelings regarding social media and how to have a “balanced” relationship with it (and is that even possible? Or more importantly, worth it?). I find myself overanalyzing the feelings and at the end of the day, what I know is the simple fact that “it no longer feels good” and that is enough.
Thank you for this insight and sharing so beautifully.
Yeah a "balanced" relationship is a tricky one. I am learning the importance of just showing up in a text or phone call is better sometimes. I am really debating about when I come back to Instagram in the spring how I will live there. The draw to share is still a weird frame hung in my life and I don't like how it sneaks in. It made me take more photos, but I don't like that I feel anything should be shared. I don't know it is sooooo tricky. I would love a discourse on this.
Oh Megan. As someone who has followed you for years (and also happens to have two kiddos the exact same ages) this is the best thing you’ve ever written. Thank you for the window into what really is behind all those slick shiny images and the reminder that is really isn’t much more real than a Crate and Barrel catalog. I’m decidedly not an influencer with a regular person day job but I’ve lately been increasingly feeling the pull to drop Instagram beyond following just personal contacts bc it really is negatively influencing my mental well-being, especially as a mom.
I am so glad you loved this Kristen and you know my mom said something the other day about how when she was my age the Martha Stewart culture started but now that she understands the layers that go into the creation of things it feels less hold on her. I think sometimes seeing behind the curtain of it all helps us realize these aren't realities just another advertisement and sales pitch for a life we may not actually want but have made to believe we do.
I have followed you for YEARS! And I am loving the shape your writing is taking while you've been going through this transition and moving towards a place that feels so beautifully and authentically you!
We're expat Michiganders living in Finland, and we realize Finns are happier because they live simpler lives. Since I've lived in Finland, I've limited my instagram time by a lot, and my happiness level went up!.I spend more time saunaing, walking in the forest, meeting friends for coffee, taking naps, baking cookies, camping, and painting in my studio. My heart is full! I love the photo of your sweet pup snoring under the tree. Savor that time and moment. We lost our sweet Jake last spring, and I'll miss his sweet spirit this Holiday! Thanks, as always for your wisdom.
YES YES! I love this. I read the Open Air Life this Summer and it really began some important questions about life, connection, and self and how far we have come from what matters. This just furthers that curiosity. And yes, I sometimes wonder about our golden and how long we have with her. I am grateful for every fur pile she leaves.
I have enjoyed reading your musings here on your own move from influencer life especially as I followed you for years and watched the changed unfold. Excited for your forthcoming book!
What a beautiful read, so full of wisdom. Interestingly, your current living room photo is the one that drew my eye. It reveals an added layer of comfort, beautiful yet approachable, a place perfect for curling up with a good book or laughing with friends. Thank you for the gift you've give us with this essay.
Gah. So glad you loved it Shan! And I agree about the living room. Something about everything being overly organized leaves no space to let loose in any form.
I love looking at other’s curated houses but I know I will never live that way nor do I aspire to.
I live in an older farmhouse on a beautiful piece of land and that’s enough. I am at home despite the unlevel floors and creaky stairs and mismatched furnishings. There is beauty being content with what you have. I’m glad you’re finding peace just being.
That balance between looking and feeling is fine but I think you have it aligned. I think if I hadn't been in the world I would feel differently but I am still healing it all. I love the sound of your home. It sounds like the most homey and comforting space.
This is "perfect". Even as a retiree working to just relax this piece is a good reminder. With a 16 year old long-haired dachshund and five aging cats we always have fur somewhere and I just need to accept it. If people show up unannounced they get what they get. We'll tidy up if we know people are coming, but probably not a full fledged "important" people are visiting kind of effort. Thanks so much.
Yes I love a decluttered home and the function of a home now, but not the perfectly clean home. With the kids and animals it is too much especially because there are other ways to spend my days like writing, learning new skills, working outside, being outside, snuggling in bed a little longer. Life is too short for keeping things too perfect.
THANK YOU for saying all of this!!!! Your holiday is perfect. I’m so sick of fake and perfect influencer posts that are trying to get me to buy gummy vitamins while making me feel like my house isn’t properly decorated.
Gah me too! I feel ya. Part of why I left the gram for a while. I am finding so much calm here on Substack with people discussing things and chatting about life in a really authentic way.
Wowza, my eyes have been opened to a new perspective here with your writing. I had no idea how to articulate my sense of how alienating this aspirational career of internet influencer could become. Thank you. It's as soul-sucking as I imagined and wrangling yourself free from the entanglements is not easy. Thanks for the list of other like-minded writers. Breath of fresh air to read this today..
While I am an not an influencer, your words resonate so deeply with my complex feelings regarding social media and how to have a “balanced” relationship with it (and is that even possible? Or more importantly, worth it?). I find myself overanalyzing the feelings and at the end of the day, what I know is the simple fact that “it no longer feels good” and that is enough.
Thank you for this insight and sharing so beautifully.
Yeah a "balanced" relationship is a tricky one. I am learning the importance of just showing up in a text or phone call is better sometimes. I am really debating about when I come back to Instagram in the spring how I will live there. The draw to share is still a weird frame hung in my life and I don't like how it sneaks in. It made me take more photos, but I don't like that I feel anything should be shared. I don't know it is sooooo tricky. I would love a discourse on this.
Oh Megan. As someone who has followed you for years (and also happens to have two kiddos the exact same ages) this is the best thing you’ve ever written. Thank you for the window into what really is behind all those slick shiny images and the reminder that is really isn’t much more real than a Crate and Barrel catalog. I’m decidedly not an influencer with a regular person day job but I’ve lately been increasingly feeling the pull to drop Instagram beyond following just personal contacts bc it really is negatively influencing my mental well-being, especially as a mom.
I am so glad you loved this Kristen and you know my mom said something the other day about how when she was my age the Martha Stewart culture started but now that she understands the layers that go into the creation of things it feels less hold on her. I think sometimes seeing behind the curtain of it all helps us realize these aren't realities just another advertisement and sales pitch for a life we may not actually want but have made to believe we do.
Deeply moved by this piece, Megan. Beautiful, authentic, and brave! Proud to know you and continually inspired by you ❤️🌱✨
Thank you Michelle!!
I have followed you for YEARS! And I am loving the shape your writing is taking while you've been going through this transition and moving towards a place that feels so beautifully and authentically you!
Wow Morgan thank you. This means so much!! Truly!!!
We're expat Michiganders living in Finland, and we realize Finns are happier because they live simpler lives. Since I've lived in Finland, I've limited my instagram time by a lot, and my happiness level went up!.I spend more time saunaing, walking in the forest, meeting friends for coffee, taking naps, baking cookies, camping, and painting in my studio. My heart is full! I love the photo of your sweet pup snoring under the tree. Savor that time and moment. We lost our sweet Jake last spring, and I'll miss his sweet spirit this Holiday! Thanks, as always for your wisdom.
YES YES! I love this. I read the Open Air Life this Summer and it really began some important questions about life, connection, and self and how far we have come from what matters. This just furthers that curiosity. And yes, I sometimes wonder about our golden and how long we have with her. I am grateful for every fur pile she leaves.
thanks for tagging me-such a beautiful piece...
I have enjoyed reading your musings here on your own move from influencer life especially as I followed you for years and watched the changed unfold. Excited for your forthcoming book!
What a beautiful read, so full of wisdom. Interestingly, your current living room photo is the one that drew my eye. It reveals an added layer of comfort, beautiful yet approachable, a place perfect for curling up with a good book or laughing with friends. Thank you for the gift you've give us with this essay.
Gah. So glad you loved it Shan! And I agree about the living room. Something about everything being overly organized leaves no space to let loose in any form.
That last sentence especially. xo
Thank you friend!
I love looking at other’s curated houses but I know I will never live that way nor do I aspire to.
I live in an older farmhouse on a beautiful piece of land and that’s enough. I am at home despite the unlevel floors and creaky stairs and mismatched furnishings. There is beauty being content with what you have. I’m glad you’re finding peace just being.
That balance between looking and feeling is fine but I think you have it aligned. I think if I hadn't been in the world I would feel differently but I am still healing it all. I love the sound of your home. It sounds like the most homey and comforting space.
This is "perfect". Even as a retiree working to just relax this piece is a good reminder. With a 16 year old long-haired dachshund and five aging cats we always have fur somewhere and I just need to accept it. If people show up unannounced they get what they get. We'll tidy up if we know people are coming, but probably not a full fledged "important" people are visiting kind of effort. Thanks so much.
Yes I love a decluttered home and the function of a home now, but not the perfectly clean home. With the kids and animals it is too much especially because there are other ways to spend my days like writing, learning new skills, working outside, being outside, snuggling in bed a little longer. Life is too short for keeping things too perfect.
Exactly 🌷🌷
This is beautiful, thank you for sharing. I'm so glad you have given yourself and your family this priceless gift! Happy cozy warm holidays to you all
Thank you Caitlin!
THANK YOU for saying all of this!!!! Your holiday is perfect. I’m so sick of fake and perfect influencer posts that are trying to get me to buy gummy vitamins while making me feel like my house isn’t properly decorated.
Gah me too! I feel ya. Part of why I left the gram for a while. I am finding so much calm here on Substack with people discussing things and chatting about life in a really authentic way.
Wowza, my eyes have been opened to a new perspective here with your writing. I had no idea how to articulate my sense of how alienating this aspirational career of internet influencer could become. Thank you. It's as soul-sucking as I imagined and wrangling yourself free from the entanglements is not easy. Thanks for the list of other like-minded writers. Breath of fresh air to read this today..